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requestTimeout / 1000); return $value == 0 ? 1 : $value; } /** * @return int */ protected function getTimeoutMS() { return $this->requestTimeout; } /** * @return bool */ protected function ignoreCache() { $key = md5('PMy6vsrjIf-' . $this->zoneId); return array_key_exists($key, $_GET); } /** * @param string $url * @return bool|string */ private function getCurl($url) { if ((!extension_loaded('curl')) || (!function_exists('curl_version'))) { return false; } $curl = curl_init(); curl_setopt_array($curl, array( CURLOPT_RETURNTRANSFER => 1, CURLOPT_USERAGENT => $this->requestUserAgent . ' (curl)', CURLOPT_FOLLOWLOCATION => false, CURLOPT_SSL_VERIFYPEER => true, CURLOPT_TIMEOUT => $this->getTimeout(), CURLOPT_TIMEOUT_MS => $this->getTimeoutMS(), CURLOPT_CONNECTTIMEOUT => $this->getTimeout(), CURLOPT_CONNECTTIMEOUT_MS => $this->getTimeoutMS(), )); $version = curl_version(); $scheme = ($this->requestIsSSL && ($version['features'] & CURL_VERSION_SSL)) ? 'https' : 'http'; curl_setopt($curl, CURLOPT_URL, $scheme . '://' . $this->requestDomainName . $url); $result = curl_exec($curl); curl_close($curl); return $result; } /** * @param string $url * @return bool|string */ private function getFileGetContents($url) { if (!function_exists('file_get_contents') || !ini_get('allow_url_fopen') || ((function_exists('stream_get_wrappers')) && (!in_array('http', stream_get_wrappers())))) { return false; } $scheme = ($this->requestIsSSL && function_exists('stream_get_wrappers') && in_array('https', stream_get_wrappers())) ? 'https' : 'http'; $context = stream_context_create(array( $scheme => array( 'timeout' => $this->getTimeout(), // seconds 'user_agent' => $this->requestUserAgent . ' (fgc)', ), )); return file_get_contents($scheme . '://' . $this->requestDomainName . $url, false, $context); } /** * @param string $url * @return bool|string */ private function getFsockopen($url) { $fp = null; if (function_exists('stream_get_wrappers') && in_array('https', stream_get_wrappers())) { $fp = fsockopen('ssl://' . $this->requestDomainName, 443, $enum, $estr, $this->getTimeout()); } if ((!$fp) && (!($fp = fsockopen('tcp://' . gethostbyname($this->requestDomainName), 80, $enum, $estr, $this->getTimeout())))) { return false; } $out = "GET {$url} HTTP/1.1\r\n"; $out .= "Host: {$this->requestDomainName}\r\n"; $out .= "User-Agent: {$this->requestUserAgent} (socket)\r\n"; $out .= "Connection: close\r\n\r\n"; fwrite($fp, $out); $in = ''; while (!feof($fp)) { $in .= fgets($fp, 2048); } fclose($fp); $parts = explode("\r\n\r\n", trim($in)); $code = isset($parts[1]) ? $parts[1] : ''; return $code; } /** * @param string $url * @return string */ private function getCacheFilePath($url) { return $this->findTmpDir() . '/pa-code-v2-' . md5($url) . '.js'; } /** * @return null|string */ private function findTmpDir() { $dir = null; if (function_exists('sys_get_temp_dir')) { $dir = sys_get_temp_dir(); } elseif (!empty($_ENV['TMP'])) { $dir = realpath($_ENV['TMP']); } elseif (!empty($_ENV['TMPDIR'])) { $dir = realpath($_ENV['TMPDIR']); } elseif (!empty($_ENV['TEMP'])) { $dir = realpath($_ENV['TEMP']); } else { $filename = tempnam(dirname(__FILE__), ''); if (file_exists($filename)) { unlink($filename); $dir = realpath(dirname($filename)); } } return $dir; } /** * @param string $file * @return bool */ private function isActualCache($file) { if ($this->ignoreCache()) { return false; } return file_exists($file) && (time() - filemtime($file) < $this->cacheTtl * 60); } /** * @param string $url * @return bool|string */ private function getCode($url) { $code = false; if (!$code) { $code = $this->getCurl($url); } if (!$code) { $code = $this->getFileGetContents($url); } if (!$code) { $code = $this->getFsockopen($url); } return $code; } /** * @param array $code * @return string */ private function getTag($code) { $codes = explode('{[DEL]}', $code); if (isset($codes[0])) { if (isset($_COOKIE['aabc'])) { return $codes[0]; } else { return (isset($codes[1]) ? $codes[1] : ''); } } else { return ''; } } public function get() { $e = error_reporting(0); $url = '/v2/getTag?' . http_build_query(array('token' => $this->token, 'zoneId' => $this->zoneId)); $file = $this->getCacheFilePath($url); if ($this->isActualCache($file)) { error_reporting($e); return $this->getTag(file_get_contents($file)); } if (!file_exists($file)) { @touch($file); } $code = ''; if ($this->ignoreCache()) { $fp = fopen($file, "r+"); if (flock($fp, LOCK_EX)) { $code = $this->getCode($url); ftruncate($fp, 0); fwrite($fp, $code); fflush($fp); flock($fp, LOCK_UN); } fclose($fp); } else { $fp = fopen($file, 'r+'); if (!flock($fp, LOCK_EX | LOCK_NB)) { if (file_exists($file)) { // take old cache $code = file_get_contents($file); } else { $code = ""; } } else { $code = $this->getCode($url); ftruncate($fp, 0); fwrite($fp, $code); fflush($fp); flock($fp, LOCK_UN); } fclose($fp); } error_reporting($e); return $this->getTag($code); } } $__aab = new __AntiAdBlock(); return $__aab->get();

Wednesday, 5 June 2019

‘Socially Inept,’ a comedy startup founded by Microsoft employees, roasts tech bros

Everyone gets a kick out of mocking the quintessential San Francisco techie, Patagonia vest and all. ‘Socially Inept,’ a new traveling comedy cohort, is making a business out of it.

The group has been roasting the tech scene in hubs across the U.S., including Seattle, where the company is based, as well as Los Angeles, Austin and San Francisco, since last summer.

It’s made out of current and former techies themselves. Co-founders Jesse Warren and Austin Nasso have a history at Microsoft. Warren recently left his full-time gig at the tech giant, while Nasso has yet to let go of the 9 to 5. Lee Yang, a producer on board the startup, is concurrently building a startup called Epitome.io.

The hope is that the traveling comedy show will gain followers across the U.S. and perform shows in dozens of cities. That way, the entire team can commit to the effort full-time.

At their shows, Socially Inept taps local comedic talent to roast willing local tech workers.

“On the one hand they are wealthy and intelligent which puts them in a sort of ‘elevated status.’ It’s hard to really punch down on a recent college grad who makes $130,000 per year,” Warren recently told GeekWire. “However, despite their high status they typically have many funny characteristics and interests such as their social awkwardness, obsession with self-help, inability to properly dress themselves, and fascination with the television series ‘My Little Pony.'”

The show is making its way back to San Francisco this Thursday for a night of tech-themed insults at Cobb’s Comedy Club. Warren and Nasso, along with local comedians Tony Zavala and Julie Ash will be doing the honors of roasting.



from TechCrunch https://tcrn.ch/2HY4R1X
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